Why run?

 

One of my friends heard about my recent trip and asked me if it was an “eat, pray, love” trip. I jokingly, said it was more like an “eat, reflect and run” trip. Then she asked me, why run? ...

…Why run? I am not much of a runner. I am a late bloomer who was introduced to running just a few years ago. I run with the grace of a new born calf attempting to walk. My pace is not great, and I run a few miles on most days. But, I still love running.

For me running is a spiritual experience. For some it’s praying, for some it’s meditating and for some it is going to the church or temple. For me it’s running? I don’t run to compete in a marathon or a half marathon. One day I might, but it’ not about that. There are days I want to beat my personal best pace, want to do an extra mile than usual, or make it to the tree on top of the hill. But, it’s not about that. It’s about that feeling you get when you run. It’s hard to describe it in words, but I’ll try. As you are running, your shins are hurting, you are gasping for air, and you almost want to stop, but then suddenly you look at the silhouette of a sailboat over a crimson sunset on the water, feel the gentle lake Erie breeze and the warmth of the sun on your face. Somehow, in that moment, all the pain and all the worries disappear. You are not worried about what your pace is or how many more miles you have to run. You are blissfully lost in that moment. In that moment, in a wired way, the universe and life makes absolute sense. You are content and at peace with yourself and the world. If that’s not spiritual, I don’t know what else is.

Running taught me a life lesson. Living is like running. We have our goals we are running towards. Project deadlines, patients to see, meetings to attend and emails to reply. We are so worried about not getting through the day, that we don’t appreciate the moment we are in and celebrate the fact that we made it so far. On such crazy days, I stop for a minute, relive the “running moment” in my mind, try to savor and accept something good about that moment without worrying about tomorrow, the next hour or the next minute. That gives me peace, hope and courage that I can make it through that day and a lifetime of such days.

Sadness and Melancholy

 

I took a few days off, as there was a lot going on in my life and I desperately needed a break. I needed that time not just to relax but also to heal & reflect. On coming back to work, one of my well-meaning colleagues was concerned and asked me if I was “depressed”. It got me thinking…

…We live in a time and society where feeling even a modicum of sadness, anger or guilt has become unfashionable. Negative emotions have been pathologized and labeled as “depression”, adjustment “disorder”, etc. Gone are the days of poets and sages where melancholy and sadness were cues to slow down, heal and reflect on our lives. The modern-day remedy is to take an “anti-depressant”, spend more time at work to distract, or mindless indulgence in activities or things to “take our mind off”. Why can’t we embrace these very emotions as a natural human condition, accept and reflect on them rather than treat them as an ailment, disease and a faux pas. What defines us and sets us apart as human beings is the ability to reflect. Negative emotions are automatic responses when we haven’t achieved, or have been deprived of what we desire and value. On reflection, if we find our desires and values to be appropriate and right, we take time to heal, accept ourselves and move on. Often what we desire and value might not be a result of thoughtful rational deliberation, but a consequence of our unconscious and uncritical acceptance of values from our parents, society, religion or our dramatic false interpretation of our past negative life-experiences. Our negative emotions are opportunities to reflect and question our values, and change them if they are not grounded in reality. To question a value held for a lifetime and change a lifelong habit takes wisdom, courage and integrity. At the risk of sounding anachronistic, I hope we can return to the age of the sages where we can embrace feeling and reflection as human attributes.

 

Getaway for the soul

This is my first Facebook post.

Sometimes life can get so exhausting that you need to get away from it. No matter how hard you try you are drowning in deadlines, emails, messages, etc. at work; struggling hard to keep a failing relationship going; trying hard to meet family and social obligations. Even a vacation becomes a laundry list of planned activities which is no longer fun. I spontaneously took a break, from all that and it was by far the best thing I ever did...
…I took a week off, switched off my cellphone & never checked my emails or facebook, and disconnected myself from the world. I went on an unplanned road trip along lake Erie. I stopped where I felt like, stayed in B&B’s, Cottages and hotels. I ran by the lake and through the woods, where the only sound I could hear was of my sneakers on the asphalt and the dirt trail. Sat on the beach and listened to the sound of the waves, kids laughing and playing on the beach; Saw the sunset over the water and the boats disappear over the horizon. Played with “Norman”, one of the cottage owners golden-doodle who greeted me every time with a big doggie hug, and a slobbering kiss ( lick). I met some fascinating and kind people who let a stranger in to their homes and hearts. I had great conversations, with people who hardly knew me, sitting around a bonfire by the lake. Had coffee with a farmer, on the porch, who told me the key to life is being happy with yourself and what you have, not working incessantly. I met a couple, on the lake front, who were married for twenty years but still looked into each others eyes like they just fell in love. These are the moments in life that make me believe that there is kindness, goodness and love in this world. These are the memories that will be lifeboats for harder times in life, that will make them bearable. If you haven’t taken time off for yourself then try it. I promise it will recharge your mind, body and spirit.